Obama Smokes!

Barack Obama was recently asked why he had not yet completely fulfilled his commitment to quit smoking. Within America, cigarettes are responsible for one in five deaths and smoking-related healthcare costs are tens of billions of dollars. The insinuation is that the president-elect should set a healthy example by being smoke-free.

Although Senator Obama has apparently tried nicotine gum as an aide to quitting smoking, I highly doubt that he has tried clinical hypnosis. Unfortunately, the misconceptions and stigma associated with hypnosis relegate it to an often overlooked treatment option.

As a psychologist, I do understand that clinical hypnosis is actually considered one of the most effective ways to quit smoking. Despite this fact, I could find no government websites that offer free self-hypnosis audio downloads for smoking cessation. Consider the fact that if there was an inexpensive medication that was well-tolerated and potentially curative for a widespread and serious medical condition, pandemonium would ensue, if it were not enthusiastically endorsed and freely made available.

Until similar official endorsement for clinical hypnosis occurs, I encourage smokers to visit QuitForFree.com for my free hypnosis for smoking cessation instant audio download, discount coupons for other quit smoking aides, and free e-book access to best-selling quit smoking publications.

Managing Stress Without Wearing Rose Colored Glasses!

Throughout the years of my career as a psychologist, I have come to understand fear to be a negative emotion from which most other negative emotions originate. Fear is essentially anxiety. Fear often underlies anger, similar to the proverbial cat with its back up against the wall. The cat lashes out in anger, because it is afraid of being attacked. Anger turned inward is often referred to as depression. And, when one feels guilty, it is typically an indication that one is either afraid of having done something wrong or is afraid of being punished. Managing fears, therefore, can also help to ease a variety of negative emotions.

Nonetheless, fear can be legitimate reaction to the situation. It is important to distinguish illegitimate and legitimate fears. The physiological and emotional reaction to real danger (i.e. - the "fight or flight response') helps one to protect oneself. The rapid heartbeat, rapid breathing, and muscle tension assists in allowing oxygen and nutrients to prepare the body for protective fighting or fleeing. Overactive fear can be an interfering and potentially unhealthy reaction to a perceived danger that is not real.

In situations that do not merit the intensity of the debilitating fear reaction, the level of the fear could also originate from a disturbing memory that has been resurrected by the current environment. The person may be reacting more to the anxiety surrounding the upsetting memory than the current situation. Illegitimate fear could stem from a misperception of the current situation. Illegitimate fear can also originate from a biochemical imbalance, wherein psychotropic medication could be a corrective intervention.

Fear and anxiety can be exacerbated by the words we use. "Should", "Have to", and "Must" are particular culprits. For example, if someone is running late for an important meeting, he or she may complicate the tardiness by suggesting that "I have to get there on time." The "have to" insinuates that if he or she is late that it would be "terrible." The word terrible is emotionally analogous to threat of nuclear warfare.

Running late for a meeting is not terrible. Emotionally, one does not necessarily know the difference between truth and exaggeration. If the perception is terror, the reaction is fear. Questioning self-talk, therefore, is vital since thoughts affect how one feels, while feelings affect how one acts. In this example, the tardy person can remind his or her self that it is his or her choice to arrive on time. It is important to affirm the fact that if the meeting starts late, he or she would actually be early. Even if he or she were late, it would be alright, since it is only a choice to arrive on-time. Although the choice is for responsible reasons, it still remains a choice. As the feelings associated with this new perspective resonate, the effect is a calmer disposition that affords this person to depart sooner, without literally tripping over his or her feet.

Some of my patients have questioned me, regarding how feelings (and not thoughts) primarily dictate one's actions and behaviors. In this regard, I like to share the following analogy. Most people probably have brand name toothpaste or soap in their bathroom. Although they intellectually know that generic toothpaste is basically the same as (and less expensive than) brand name, they pay more for the brand name, because they feel that it will provide them with "fresher breath and whiter teeth." The behavior, within this example, is to pay more for something that is basically the same as the cheaper brand. In essence, feelings trumped thought.

In essence, thoughts affect feelings. Feelings affect behavior. Behavior affects one's future experiences. Understanding the interplay between one's thoughts and feelings can afford one the opportunity to better manage one's feelings, behaviors and resultant experiences. No one is suggesting to look at oneself, others, and the world with "rose colored glasses." It is suggested that one attempt to look at oneself, others, and the world in the most balanced, positive, and accurate manner possible.

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EMDR & Mindfulness
Information from my PESI seminar on combining meditative exercises with Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. Includes free e-book downloads and other helpful self-help tools!
http://www.ThePsychologist.com/pesi.htm


LibriVox
Free audiobook downloads of books that are public domain. You can even volunteer your time to read for this initiative.
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Self-Actualization Within Dual-Career Families and the Healthy Need For Balance Or Stress Management

Dual-career relationships foster couples' abilities to self-actualize within multiple areas of their lives. Higher education, family responsibilities, child care, career, and improved capacity for intimacy are just some of the worthy pursuits that this lifestyle helps to foster. The obvious benefit of the additional income cannot be understated, especially within a society that places increased demands upon "keeping up with the Joneses."

The added stress, however, of organizing demanding schedules and child care can seem daunting. The ease with which one can "lose one's self" is also a potentially dangerous "workaholism" type of escapism. The insidious and consistent detachment of one's feelings through this type of escapism can dull valuable feelings, which can further and ultimately alienate the over-achiever from him or herself and others, leading to confusion, poor direction, and despair.

Balance is crucial, in order for the dual-career relationship to experience long-term success. Achieving a balance between family, work, and educational responsibilities is now becoming less of an ideal and more of a reality, for example, given the innovative learning opportunities that accredited online programs now provide. "Thinking outside the box" in similar, non-traditional ways is vital, in order to strike a healthy balance and mange stress within this multifaceted lifestyle.

Especially within a dual-career relationship, healthy choices, are the keys to striking a balance between one's physical, intellectual, emotional, interpersonal, and spiritual needs.
Numerous online self-help, meditative materials also exist that can afford helpful ways to manage stress and improve sleep. Timeless advise, like getting plenty of sleep, exercise, eating properly, and taking time to de-stress is even more important today than ever before.

Self-Esteem and the "Binocular Trick"

People naturally want their thoughts, feelings, and experiences to be consistent. If someone interviews for a job, for example, that pays them more than they thought that they would ever earn (even though they are capable of and deserving of the job), their thought that they are incapable is inconsistent with their experience of being offered the interview. Ultimately, they will likely feel very nervous about the interview. As a result of this anxiety and worry, they will not likely interview well. Therefore, they will likely be rejected for the job. This rejection can be internalized as "proof" that they are undeserving, thereby added to their lower sense of self and self-esteem.

Immediately after their aforementioned rejection, their initial anxiety will likely ease, because their experience (getting rejected) is now consistent with their untrue thought (that they are not deserving). Nonetheless, they will likely continue to feel inferior and earn less money. The true reality, however, is that they were and are capable. As they understand this truth (no matter the etiology of the original belief) both in how he/she thinks and feels about themself, they will perform much better in the future. This improved performance (based upon this change in perception and healthy understanding) will likely lead to ongoing approval and acceptance. This positive experience will likely lead to an overall improved sense of self, self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-image.

Another common "cognitive distortion," as described by Burns, that influences self-esteem is known as the "binocular trick." If one has ever looked into a pair of binoculars the wrong way, everything looks far away. In essence, people sometimes use this phenomenon upon themselves, while comparing themselves with others. One might look at one's own accomplishments as if through the wrong end of a pair of binoculars. Conversely, one may examine another's accomplishments as if through the right way through the same binoculars. When looking at one's shortcomings, there may be a tendency to examine these deficits as if looking at them properly though binoculars. On the other hand, others' shortcomings are examined in the opposite way.

Since most publicly embellish personal strengths, while minimizing weaknesses, the etiology of this discrepancy becomes self-evident. When comparing out, it is ultimately vital to remember that our self-knowledge far exceeds our understanding of others. This imbalanced perspective creates an illusion that can be overcome, therefore, by means of an awareness of the role of the binocular trick and the realization that everyone has his or her own set of shortcomings and strengths.

The "Power of Self-Talk" (DOC file)

I would like to share the following two new additions which have recently been highlighted on my website. "PsychSplash" and "Psychological Self-Help" appear to be invaluable resources...

PsychSplash is a service of PsychCentral that showcases psychology-related websites. Psychological Self-Help is Dr. Clayton Tucker-Ladd's FREE online offering.



Dr. Clayton E. Tucker-Ladd's
Psychological Self-Help
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Free ebook hosted by psychologicalselfhelp.org.

 

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Experts disagree...What do you think of "The Secret?"

"The Secret," a best-selling DVD, is also available as an inspirational book, written by Rhonda Byrne. The basic tenant is that the things upon which we focus tend to become our reality, as we allow things to happen and do things, consistent with this structured focus, in order to manifest our desires. Furthermore, "The Secret" emphasizes the power inherent within the "Law of Attraction" and "The Power of Intention." Although all the ideas shared within this remarkable program are not necessarily based in science, one can nonetheless benefit from acting "as if" the ideas are all-true, in order to facilitate success. I believe that the true wisdom of "The Secret" is its ability to captivate a world's imagination, by offering its heartfelt reminder of the true nature of limitless possibilities and the power of human perseverance.

Scranton's John Norcross, Ph.D. on CBS News - March 1, 2007

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In my opinion, 19th Century German philosopher, Arthur Schopenhauer, seemed to have summed it best by having declared "All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident."

James Arthur Ray's website.

Click HERE to watch the entire DVD version of "The Secret."

Era Of Pills Means Less Talk Therapy???

A recent news story stated that the "Era Of Pills Means Less Talk Therapy." The article highlights the current trend over the decrease in psychotherapy offered, during psychiatric visits. Although it may be true that many insurance companies offer psychiatrists reimbursement incentives to offer more "medication management" than "talk therapy," psychotherapy remains an integral part of mental health treatment.

Within private practice, psychiatrists are medical doctors who specialize in prescribing psychotropic medication. Psychologists are licensed, non-physician specialists who offer counseling or psychotherapy services. Most insurance reimburses for full 45-50 minute sessions with psychologists. It is not uncommon for many patients to be simultaneously treated by both a psychiatrist and psychologist.

Does Therapy Really Help?

Psychologists are healthcare professionals who rely upon scientific method to understand human behavior. Within a clinical setting, psychologists apply their expertise in a balanced manner, between a directive style and the recognition of the importance of allowing themselves to be more of a facilitator to help their clients help themselves. For most people, this approach allows for accurate assessment of presenting concerns and facilitation of personal growth.

As humans, we do have an innate capacity toward health. Physically, for example, if we cut ourselves, we usually heal. Sometimes, however, if there is an infection, the cut will likely fester, continuing to cause problems, until the wound is cleansed. Therapy can be considered a way to help clean festering, "emotional wounds" that are contributing to present concerns. Although we are a species that is fairly resilient, therapy is a deliberate way, however, to facilitate our resiliency, in order to allow positive change to occur sooner, rather than later.

Talking with an objective other can offer a unique perspective conducive to emotional growth. When attempting to be supportive, unfortunately, family and friends can often make inappropriate comments, like: "Forget it" or "Don't worry about it." Usually that tactic is much easier said than done. Although well-intentioned, these statements tend to serve to further alienate oneself from one's feelings. One's feelings (both pleasant and unpleasant) offer the useful purpose of guiding one in better understanding oneself. It is the misunderstanding or avoidance of feelings that is often a catalyst to undermining our innate process, which helps us to be resilient in the first place.

There is a growing recognition of the fact that "mental health is fundamental to a person's overall health, indispensable to personal well-being and instrumental to leading a balanced and productive life." This awareness likely contributes to the fact that about 15% of our country's population now use some form of mental health services in any given year. Nonetheless, despite effective treatments, according to Dr. Satcher's 1999 Surgeon General's Mental Health report, "Nearly half of all Americans who have a severe mental illness fail to seek treatment". The fact that nearly one in five Americans are affected by a mental disorder, reinforces the understanding that "few Americans are untouched by mental illness", whether directly or indirectly.

Mental illnesses range from clinical anxiety and depression to Alzheimer's disease and schizophrenia. Anxiety disorders, the most common form of mental illness, affect more than 10% of Americans yearly. Almost 25% of Americans will suffer an anxiety disorder at some point in their lives.

Misunderstandings about therapy have kept many from seeking timely, effective care. Similar early misunderstandings, within the medical field, for example, had also existed within the field's early years. I trust that the continued acceptance and appreciation of the discipline of psychology will dispel any residual misunderstandings about its efficacious use and appropriateness to overall healthcare.

Is Our Society Becoming More Callous?

I am writing in response to the disheartening headline that shocked local and national media observers. A recently released surveillance video depicted a tragic hit-and-run scene, wherein witnesses seemingly ignored the elderly Hartford pedestrian, who lay motionless in the middle of the busy street. The report appears to insinuate that our society has become callous to its brethren. Although I certainly do not condone the onlookers' inaction, I do hope to offer insight into their questionable behavior.

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What happened in Hartford is likely an example of what is termed the "bystander effect." Each witness, perhaps confused and aghast at what they just evidenced, look at the other witnesses to see what they are going to do, assuming that the others will take responsibility. The sum result is total inaction. Ironically, this man likely had a better chance of getting help sooner, if there were only one or two witnesses present. When there exist more than two witnesses, the social phenomenon of "diffusion of responsibility" can bring about the bystander effect.

Understanding the existence of this phenomenon can help future bystanders break free from its effects. Additionally, if one finds oneself in the role of the victim, one should attempt to single out a particular bystander, by pointing to the one witness and requesting their singular assistance. Although the severity of his injuries certainly prevented this victim from making any requests, it is somewhat reassuring that at least some of the witnesses, in this case, did phone 911.